Comedy from the Late Night Comics
With all the seriousness coming up in the coming weeks, we thought we'd offer something a little lighter this evening.
Ten John Edwards Joke to Lighten the Mood
"Well, the other big political story, if you believe there are two Americas, then John Edwards is in trouble in both of them. Do you know about this? The mainstream media [is] now starting to report a story that was first broken by the National Enquirer that John Edwards was caught leaving his girlfriend's hotel room at the Beverly Hilton Hotel at 2:00 in the morning. The woman had a room at the Beverly Hilton. So, at least he is not another politician screwing the poor." --Jay Leno
"Well, here's the latest on John Edwards' vice presidential chances. Too much vice, not enough presidential. Have you heard this story? The mainstream media is now starting to report on a story that was first broken by the National Enquirer this week. The National Enquirer claimed they caught John Edwards visiting his mistress at 2:40 in the morning at the Beverly Hills hotel Monday night. And when a team of reporters confronted him, he ran and hid in the men's room! And you know who was in there? Senator Larry Craig. What are the odds?" -Jay Leno
"How about this John Edwards thing? Imagine that, a personal injury attorney who turns out to be a sleaze ball. Who could have seen that coming?" --Jay Leno
"John Edwards has admitted to having an affair, but he's denying that he is the father of the woman's baby. In fact, he says a member of his campaign staff is the baby's father. Campaign staff, how does that work? What, was Edwards running late that day? Huh? Had to send an advance man in? 'Look, I can’t have sex with you. I'm sending Bob down." --Jay Leno
"I thought this was nice, at one point during the (Olympic) ceremony tonight they had 56 children march in, all belonging to John Edwards." --Jay Leno
"I guess Edwards apparently met this woman at a New York City bar in 2006, and he is a pretty smooth operator. ... You hear his opening line to the woman? 'So, uh, which America are you from?'" --Jay Leno
"No, he actually said today about the other woman, he doesn't love her. Oh that's smart, now you've got two women mad at you. Great, way to go." --Jay Leno
"You know what ... it turns out she was his campaign videographer. Yeah, there you go. Think there'll be a sex tape coming soon, huh?" --Jay Leno
"Well, Democrats are furious, they're going on record now saying John Edwards will not be allowed to speak at the convention because of this affair. Yeah, instead speaking in his place: Bill Clinton. You have to put your foot down." --Jay Leno
"In fact, when John McCain heard about the John Edwards affair, he said 'Well, thank God I can't get an erection anymore, whew.' Some problems just take care of themselves." --Jay Leno
Compiled by Mondoreb
image: msnbc
Sources:
* Late Night Political Jokes
* John Edwards Jokes